Subway Order Gone Wrong My Have Jared And Mike Go Hard Request

Hey everyone! Ever had one of those moments where you thought you were being clever, but it just didn't land the way you expected? Well, buckle up because I’ve got a story for you that involves a certain sandwich shop, a rather suggestive phrase, and a whole lot of awkward silence. It all started with a craving – a craving for a Subway sandwich, to be exact. I was feeling adventurous, you know? I wanted a sub that was, shall we say, epic. So, I strolled into my local Subway, ready to unleash my creativity on a poor, unsuspecting sandwich artist.

The Grand Order

Now, I’m not usually one to make complicated orders. I like my Italian B.M.T. with the usual fixings, maybe some extra olives if I’m feeling fancy. But this time, I wanted to go big or go home. As the sandwich artist slid my bread down the assembly line, I took a deep breath and uttered the words that would forever change my Subway experience. "Alright," I said, with what I thought was a confident smirk, "I want you to have Jared and Mike go hard on this sub." The sandwich artist blinked. Then blinked again. I could practically hear the gears turning in their head as they tried to decipher my… unique request. I thought I was being hilarious, you know? Playing on the whole "go hard" slang and referencing, albeit indirectly, Subway's somewhat checkered past. In my mind, I was a comedic genius. In reality, I was probably just making things incredibly uncomfortable. The silence that followed was thick enough to cut with a bread knife. You could hear the gentle hum of the refrigerators, the distant chatter of other customers, and the frantic scrambling of my brain trying to come up with a way to backpedal. The sandwich artist’s expression was a mix of confusion, concern, and maybe a hint of “should I call the manager?” I realized then and there that my attempt at humor had landed with the grace of a lead balloon.

The Awkward Silence

To break the tension, I stammered, “You know… like, load it up! Lots of toppings!” The sandwich artist gave a nervous chuckle and started piling on the veggies. But the air was still heavy with the unspoken question: What did I really mean by that? Every interaction felt loaded. “More lettuce?” they asked, their voice tinged with caution. “Yes, please,” I replied, trying to sound as innocent as possible. “Go… go crazy.” Oh god, why did I say that? It was like I was digging myself deeper into a hole of awkwardness. The whole process felt like an eternity. Each topping, each sauce, each slice of cheese was placed with deliberate slowness, as if they were performing some kind of delicate surgery. I could feel the eyes of the other customers on me, wondering what kind of sandwich-ordering psychopath I was. And honestly, I was starting to wonder that myself. By the time the sub was finally wrapped and ready to go, I was sweating bullets. I paid for my sandwich, mumbled a quick “thanks,” and practically sprinted out of the store. I needed to escape the judgment, the confusion, the lingering scent of toasted bread and regret. The sandwich itself? It was actually pretty good, to be honest. They definitely didn't skimp on the toppings, which I guess is what I asked for. But every bite was tinged with the memory of my epic fail, a constant reminder of the time I tried to be funny and ended up just being… weird.

The Aftermath

So, what did I learn from this experience? Firstly, my comedic timing needs some serious work. Secondly, there’s a fine line between clever and just plain awkward, and I crossed it with the enthusiasm of a marathon runner. And finally, maybe, just maybe, it’s best to stick to a simple order at Subway. No more cryptic requests, no more suggestive slang, just a straightforward “Italian B.M.T., please.” I've replayed the scenario in my head countless times since then, each time cringing a little more. I imagine the sandwich artist telling the story to their coworkers, the tale of the guy who wanted Jared and Mike to “go hard” on his sub becoming a legendary Subway anecdote. And who knows, maybe it’ll even become a cautionary tale, a reminder that sometimes, the best jokes are the ones you keep to yourself. But hey, at least I got a good story out of it, right? And maybe, just maybe, I've provided a valuable public service announcement: Think before you speak, especially when ordering a sandwich. So, the next time you're at Subway, remember my story. Order your sub with clarity, precision, and a complete absence of innuendo. You'll thank me later. And who knows, you might even avoid becoming the subject of a future Reddit post. Because trust me, it's not a comfortable place to be.

Lessons Learned: Keep It Simple at Subway

Subway, sandwiches, humor, and awkward encounters – these are the key ingredients in my recent misadventure. You see, I've always considered myself a bit of a comedian, a wordsmith who can turn a simple phrase into a laugh riot. But my recent trip to Subway taught me a valuable lesson: some jokes are best left unsaid, especially when they involve sandwich artists and potentially suggestive phrases. My intention was simple – I wanted a sub loaded with toppings. In my quest for the ultimate sandwich, I decided to use a bit of colorful language. I walked up to the counter, brimming with confidence, and said,